Friday, 16 September 2011

Fairy tale Friday #11


After all the trouble last week, it has been very quiet around the towers. Everyone has been keeping to themselves and nursing their wounds, a couple of the girls went AWOL and haven’t been seen since,hence the DT call. Claire is still in Tunisia, but has sent us a postcard to say that she is feeling better and will be back very soon, she just wants to finish knitting a camel hair twin-set first.

Edna went to the doctors this week for a check-up and when she arrived back at the towers she fled upstairs to her room in tears. We were all really worried about her, thinking that she must have some terrible disease or really serious illness.
When she finally calmed down she told us what had happened.

It seems the doctor had asked her how much she weighed, “eight and a half stone” replied Edna,
The doctor makes her get on the scales and tells her she actually weighs ten stone!
Next the doctor asks her height “5 foot 8” she says
The doctor checks and tells her she is only 5 foot 2”
He then takes her blood pressure and tells her that it is very high,
“Of course it’s HIGH!!!” screams Edna, “when I came in here I was tall and slender……..
Now I’m short and fat!!!

We thought a couple of drinks might cheer her up, so Jill and Helle went to their room and brought down a crate of Vodka (they brew it themselves using potatoes, I keep telling them to use fresh potatoes from the garden, but they insist it tastes better when it’s made from leftover chips!!! To be honest it tastes a little like drain cleaner, although I think they probably add a bit of that too for flavour). It’s strong stuff though and it’s not long before everyone is feeling merry and we are all friends again.

Then Debbie, who has become a bit big for her boots since she became Top Tip co-ordinator, offered to sing a couple of songs for us. To begin she sang Abba’s dancing queen, she sounded like a cat being strangled, but made us laugh when she sang Dancing Queen, feel the heat of the tangerine!!!  instead of feel the beat of the tambourine, but things went from bad to worse when she began a Beatles medley, she started with ‘It’s a hard days night I should be leaping like a frog’ instead of sleeping like a log, then she went into ‘All Anita’s love!, (All you need is love) which led into the chorus of ‘love is on your knee! (love is all you need)’  Next was - Can’t buy me love, which Debbie sang as ‘Camp Bunny Love’ then I Wanna Hold your Hand, Debbie’s version ‘I wanna hold your gland, by this time we were laughing so much that Edna wet herself (good job she was wearing her Tena Lady's)!

Her next song was Letter B, letter B, letter B, letter B, creaking words of wiz-bum, letter B (which should have been let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be, speaking words of wisdom, let it be)  ‘Love, love my pooh, you know a number two, it's always deep blue, so please, love my pooh’ (Love, love me do, you know I love you, I’ll always be true, so please, love me do) and she finally finished off with ‘She’s got  a chicken to fry and it’s in my hair!!!’ (She’s got a ticket to ride and she don’t care).  We tried to keep a straight face as we gave her a round of applause, and Edna was shouting for an encore, but Debbie said she needed to rest her throat and was going to bed, which was lucky really as Edna was sitting in a rather large yellow puddle by this time, Tammy had split the sides of her rubber dress, Jill slept through it all, snoring gently, and using her empty vodka bottle as a pillow, Helle had fallen off the chair laughing, bumped her head on the stone floor and was laying there, unconscious. Gayle, Kathy, Nela and Nicole were trying to look serious but had mascara stained tears streaming down their faces. Debbie asked them what the tears were for and Kathy thinking quickly said that her voice was so beautiful it had made them emotional, Debbie was really pleased with this and said if she was that good she might apply for the X-Factor!!!!!!  

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Go and visit Teddy Bo and Co and have a look at this weeks top tip, a colouring tutorial by the boss lady herself.


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Now check out some Design Team creations

Nicole



I´ve playing with the sweet image *Bloomin´ gorgeous*
sentiment by myself
coloring as always with Prismas
Bazill cardstock in pink and brown
backing paper from Bo Bunny
Whimsy Stamps cutting die *Elegant Butterflies*
I´ve decorated with rhinestones

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Nela




Here is a Step-card with


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Edna


I've used Teddybo 128 'Sending you a note'
Basic Grey 'Oxford' papers
Ribbon from stash
Prismas for colouring
Tim Holtz rosette die
Marianne design swirly leaf die
Stamping Up spiral punch; sentiment stamp from Summer Days stamp set
Mosaic gems from Papermania
Walnut stain distress ink

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If you fancy joining this wonderfully alcoholic friendly design team then see previous post for details, also don't forget you still have a couple of days to get your entries into our Say it with Flowers challenge. All entries must be in by Sunday midnight(GMT) if you want to be in with the chance of winning the Teddy Bo Ten, your choice of ten digi images from the Teddy Bo Store, so get your entries in now.

6 comments:

  1. I wondered why I had a sore throat **** wanders off singing*** A Good Scarf These days is Hard to Find, Choose Wool the Lasting Kind - by Fergal Sharkey :c) xx

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  2. Hi love these fairytales ! They get better and more mad by the week. Great stuff thanks for the side splitting giggles !! Kitty :D

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  3. Thanks for bringing a smile to my face, needed it today and your stories never disappoint,
    H xx

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  4. ha, ha, ha!!!!!
    have a good weekend x

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  5. This post made me hoot! My favourite song being "She’s got a chicken to fry and it’s in my hair". Even just typing it here made me laugh again and I know I shall be singing it that way for ever more. My family sings some intesting lyrics; my sister's version of KD Lang's "can't stand gravy" ("Constant Craving") is a favourite or her husband's version of Police's "Message in a Bottle" where he sings "it's been years since I broke my nose" (where it should be "wrote my note"), and my own personal contribution is that Peabo Bryson and Roberta Flack hit "Tonight I sellotape my glove to you"! Thank you for sharing this fun post! I'm off to sing a song now! Hugs,Lesley

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  6. I'm a bit late this week, but so glad I finally got here to read and laugh...
    I make up my own words cause I cant understand half of what the singers are singing, but like the tunes...Ah! dear...I can visualise you lot in the towers....twinsets and rubber dresses..lol..drunk on potato vodka..
    I love coming here...thanks for the great laugh.

    Luv CHRISSYxx

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